Posts tagged ‘Writing’

December 3, 2010

Boredom, Day Five: Woot, Woot!

Check it out!  It only took me like eleventy million tries, but at last, AT LAST!! success is mine!

Spider Solitaire should write odes to me! 

Also, after this post, I had several comments from those nearest and dearest stating that perhaps I should write a book. 

A)  I’m flattered. 

B)  Okay!  Let’s do this! 

So, I guess, be prepared for some mumbling and grumbling in the weeks ahead because I’m sure it’s not going to go smoothly.  Forewarned is prepared.  Or something. 

But FYI, if someone says they’d like to pay me money to interview Jared Leto and find out his take on s’mores (world’s greatest food pairing OR highly overrated/room for improvement) I’m one hundred eleventy percent on board with that idea. 

P.S.  The correct answer is world’s greatest food pairing. 

Advertisements
December 1, 2010

Contemplations in boredom, Day Three: Entrepreneurialism

Spider Solitaire (Windows)

Image via Wikipedia

Dude, Internet, I’m having one of those days.  You know the kind of day where you spend your day writing an ode to “Spider Solitaire?”  That kind of day?  One of those.  What does it mean?  Am I having an existential crisis?  That doesn’t seem likely.  I feel pretty comfortable with my place in the universe.  Mid-life crisis then?  I fucking hope not.  That means I expire far sooner than I’m ready too.  I have a lot of things I want to do in my life and thirty years is not nearly enough time to accomplish those things, thanksverymuch.  So no, not a mid-life crisis.

Oh God, Internet, I know what it is!  I know what’s afflicting me.

Boredom.

Internet, I’m sooooooooooooooooooo bored.  Seems innocuous enough, but I assure you it’s not.  I have always far preferred being busy versus not.   Some people can sit around with their own company and they are perfectly comfortable and at ease doing just that.  Not this gal.  And not because it forces me to look inside and face my own mind.  I’m really comfortable with what bonks around in there.  Me and my brain?  We’re besties.  Sitting around doing nothing just simply makes me feel inactive.  Wasteful.  And that in turn makes me feel anxious and irritable and eventually the kind of batty that generally results in ode’s to computer card games. 

I know the culprit of my boredom.  A lot of it is a direct result of being smack-dab in the middle of the slow season at work (I wrote an ode to Spider Solitaire today, does that give you some idea as to how slow it is?  The other day I wrote a fake interview with Mark Salling.  And was so amused by it that I literally had to stop myself from laughing out loud at least a dozen times while writing it.).  The rest of it is because I finally figured out what my passion is.  I hard-core love writing.  I realized it’s my thang.  This has resulted in insane boredom whenever I’m doing work other than writing.  It consumes my thoughts.  I dream about it.  I can’t wait to get home and write, write, write.  I intensely wish that I had figured this out when I was young and stupid and carefree because I’m quite positive my life would be a heck of a lot different right about now (My professional one.  The rest of it I like just fine.).

I’ve spent a lot of time in my brain the past few weeks and I’ve started thinking how I might entice an eMagazine, like thegloss.com, to hire me as a columnist.  I’ve met me and I’d hire me.  They say you’re your own worst critic so this is probably the best recommendation in the history of recommendations.  I could be their Celebrity Interviewer Columinist.  I’d revolutionize it.  They’d have the most awesome celebrity interviews.  They’d kick every other eMag’s butt. 

Competitor eMag:  Oh, hey, I just interviewed Mark Salling.  I found out he hates his faux-hawk.  Praise me for this awesome journalism!

Me:  Oh really?  You found out he hates his faux-hawk?  Did you find out where he stands on “Vampires vs. Zombies (to the victor goes the humans)?”

Competitor eMag:  Uhhhh….no?

Me:  Well, I did.  And that’s why Mark and I will survive the Zombiepocalypse.  And you probably won’t.  But props to you on the hard-hitting investigative journalism!

This is probably word for word exactly how it would happen.  You’re welcome, thegloss.com.

The other day I was thinking what my form letter requesting they hire me would look like.  Proabably something like this:

It's not pink...but it is scented.

 

Best.  Form Letter.  Ever.

Who wouldn’t want to hire me after a gem like that?  (Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.)

Now would probably be a swell time to post my ode to “Spider Solitaire.”

“Ode to Spider Solitaire.”

Oh, Spider Solitaire, you fickle beast

I thought I had bested you

With just one suit, I conquered you time and time again

Look at me win! 

I am Ali “Spider Solitaire Champion.”

But then you sly brute, you

You whisper, “Now try me with two suits and see how you do.”

Oh, Spider Solitaire!

You got me!

But wait! 

I have bested you again!

Behold Ali! “Spider Solitaire Champion!”

Not to be outdone, you bellow:  “NOW TRY ME WITH FOUR SUITS!”

And so I have

Oh, Spider Solitaire, you have foiled me!

You best me time and time again

But take care, Spider Solitaire!

I will conquer you!

And if I don’t?

I’m switching back to Freecell.

Not only am I the most awesome of awesomest celebrity interviewers, I write a pretty mean ode if I do say so myself. 

Tag, you’re it, thegloss.com.

October 31, 2010

The only time traffic is bueno



Last night at a Halloween party, I had a quick discussion with Mbrotha’s friend Jay about the various rock concerts we’ve attended and which bands rocked and which ones didn’t.  Naturally, I mentioned that 30STM is the cat’s pajamas when it comes to rock concerts (but not on Friday, November 5th.  Sigh…) to which Jay replied, “I know, I’ve read your blog.”

Woo! 

I know people read my blog as WordPress provides me with handy little stats regarding the traffic to my blog and from which sites said traffic originates.  It displays lovely little graphs with information as to how many visitors I have and which posts they’re reading.  (So far, Dear Jared, Shannon and Tomo, you kinda broke my heart is winning in the race for top-viewed post.  And naturally, that’s the one they read…).   But it doesn’t tell me who’s reading my blog, only the site they used to get there.  So it’s pretty flipping AWESOME to hear it in person.  Thanks, Jay!

Yesterday I wrote a post that differed from my usual posts, because it involved a topic that hits pretty close to home.  Lately I’ve involved myself in a mission for self-acceptance.  The other day I read an article that really bothered me (see my post entitled Outrage) and this started me thinking that I can’t remember the last time I heard of a global positivity movement and it made me want to start one.  Now I’m a little obsessed.  Today I researched ways to increase traffic to my blog so that way I can spread the word and maybe I can really get this thing going.  Consequently, the following will make little sense to anyone but me:

WPBVUTYNC7ZT

Much of the promotion of my blog required me to figure out exactly what this blog is about.  I reviewed my previous posts because, initially, I’d hoped to simply use it as a platform for purging my brain of extraneous thoughts so I had a clean slate for writing.  And naturally, it has evolved into more than that for me.  A lot of my posts discuss my quest for self-acceptance and answers to that pesky little question of what to do with my life so I figured this was probably the most accurate description. 

(You’d also not be surprised to learn that I promote the hell out of Thirty Seconds to Mars in many of my posts (shocking, I know…).  I heart them (you don’t say…).  And I figure this is the best platform for me to pester my friends and family into hearting them as well.  Of course, if you’re looking for them to notice you so that someday you’ll be BFF’s with either Jared, Shannon, or Tomo, I don’t recommend writing a post detailing exactly the how’s and why’s of why you may be pissed at them for cancelling a show.  Turns out?  They notice that kind of thing and trust me when I say that being noticed for excessive awesomeness is definitely preferable vs. being noticed because of bad press.  I imagine a retweet on Twitter by any one of the guys is ten different shades of awesome.  Having them tweet directly to you and tell you YOU broke THEIR hearts? 

Bittersweet.  So very bittersweet…)

So far my experiment is a success.  Thank you, Jenn, for posting your comment in response to Because I love deep fried oreos.  I hope others will feel comfortable in following in your footsteps.  I would LOVE to open up my Facebook page one morning and see my timeline filled with statuses from everyone I know and love stating why they love them.  And if I can encourage someone I don’t know?  Even better.  If everyone everywhere took one day to state one reason why they are amazing? 

That day would be the most AWESOME day in the history of days.  It really really would. 

October 4, 2010

Brave New World

Ah!  For the love of 30STM!  What I’m about to tell you, Internet, is so dang exciting, I might burst from the anticipation of it all!  True freaking story! 

Upon my arrival home today, I logged into my email to see which of my adoring fans had hit me up (one) and as I was scrolling through message after message of effusive adulation re: the awesomeness that is moi, I came across an email from my very dear friends, Mr. Barnes & Mr. Noble.  Do you know what they told me, Internet?? 

Jasdfoijaeroiernfaoeirjwenrfosejawe roiasjfsmfjwe!

(That’s me so excited about what they had to say that my fingers couldn’t move fast enough for my brain.  Or my fingers moved too fast for my brain to follow.  Whatever.  The point is I’m excited.)

They told me they would love nothing more in this world than to publish my book.  My book!

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT????!!!!!

By far, the most exciting thing to happen this week. 

Soooooooooooo, adoring fans, prepare yourself for “Ali = Awesome = Ali” (working title) to hit your eReaders sometime hopefully before the end of 2010 via PubIt! by Barnes&Noble.  I guarantee it will be awesome. 

Like me!  😉

September 30, 2010

Seven different shades of AWESOME

Oh boy, Internet, do I have news! 

Pretty much the most exciting thing um, EVER, has happened!

Thirty Seconds to Mars (This band I sorta like.  I may have mentioned them a time or two…) is holding an open casting call for their next video, “Hurricane” (Tray—Hurricane.  Definitely.) for fans in the New York City area….which I am! 

I think the exact sequence of events went something like this:

“OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!!!!!!!!TIMMY,30STM!30STM!OPENCASTINGCALL!HURRICANE!HURRICANE!!!!!!”

(shouted while running from the office to the living room and back again…I believe there was also some jumping involved, it’s hard to be sure, it was a crazy time)

“TRAY!M6!WHEREAREYOU????????CALLME!!HURRICANE,TRAY!!!HURRICANE!!!CALLMEEEEEEEEEEEE!!)

(shouted while hopping from one foot to the other)

“M1!HURRICANE!CALL!PICS!SATURDAY!CALL!!!!!)

(shouted while running out of the house as all the neighbors turned to see the commotion…again I believe some jumping was involved)

It continued on like this for a while (the rest of the night).  There was more shouting, flailing gestures and too much excitement for this poor girl to contain.  But then a thought occurred to me.  When I’m chosen, well there’s the small issue of the fact that I would have to be on camera and filmed.  With Jared fucking Leto.  And that’s when the panic set in.

Which is kind of about right, if we go on past experience.  In the past, I’ve been camera shy…figuratively and literally.  And you know what?  I’m tired of it.  In the past, I’ve only let my AWESOME shine once I’ve gotten to know you inside and out.  No longer, Internet, no longer!  Time to let my AWESOME shine from the get go.

I mentioned in a previous post my hang-ups regarding writing.  And that one of the reasons for this blog is to help me work through those.  And you know what?  It has.  I had a tendency to worry too much what people might say about what goes on in my head (there’s some wacked-out shit in there, let me tell you…), so more times than not I kept my mouth shut unless we were besties. 

But recently I’ve discovered that I’m AWESOME.  Truly AWESOME.  Everyone should feel this way, in my opinion.  I LOVE being happy, always have.  And I think it’s time I just let it all out.  I want to live my life, my way:  wacked out, crazy, happy, joyful, insane.  And I’m tired of caring of what others think of it. 

So you know what I did?  I pulled up my email and I sent Jared, Shannon and Tomo a message with my info and expressed my extreme desire to show my love and support for their band by being in their video.  And I sent them pics of myself being me and I’m letting the cards fall where they may.  And when I’m chosen, I’m actually really psyched to be on camera.  With Jared fucking Leto. 

Whether or not my mouth obeys my brain and doesn’t issue forth a string of nonsensical babbling.

So, Internet and friends, today’s tasks in handy list format:

1.  Go forth and be AWESOME.

Just do it.  Don’t worry about what others think.  I’ll be right there with you being my own seven different shades of AWESOME.

2.  Fall in love with an AWESOME band

Might I suggest Thirty Seconds to Mars? 

3.  Develop a serious crush on an up and coming AWESOME band

Here’s one:  Again and Again

4.  Tell Danny Gokey he’s wonderful, or AWESOME.  Either one will do.

I really don’t think he’s told that often enough.

5.  Continue being AWESOME.

 Also, if you’d like to try out for the “Hurricane” video, click here:  Thirty Seconds to Mars Open Casting Call for Hurricane Video.